Day 8 v2012

"And we desire that each one of you show the same diligence to the full assurance of hope until the end, that you do not become sluggish, but imitate those who through faith and patience inherit the promises," (Hebrews 6:11-12).

God keeps circling me around these verses.  Why? Probably because the premise of patient endurance isn't my normal cup of tea.  Not many of us sip from the well of waiting very well.  Know what I mean? Sorry for the pun.  Had to.

There is a huge principle here that God will keep pointing my nose into until I get it.  I need to learn this lesson.  I need to learn and practice patient endurance.

Can I be honest? Ugh.  I particularly don't want to learn patient endurance.  Why?  Because it means wrestling with the varmits known as "hurry up and wait";  "lots of build up only to receive a no";  "is this ever going to happen?"; "is this still God's call on my life" and the classic hit of "I don't think I want to do this anymore."  Sound familiar?  Just read posts 5, 6, 7.... **sigh**

Making a film is like trying to align the stars.  To me, it feels like once in a century is it ever going to happen.  I go through waves of complete uncertainty if it is ever going to actually happen.  But, the thing is... it's going to happen.

God has laid the ground work.  Now, He asks me to wait.  But, I want to do this film now.  No.  He says wait.  How do I know? I know because I keep getting reminded and pointed to verses like Hebrews 6:11-12.  I keep getting reminded of how Sarah was beyond her years when the promise came to fruition.  It was later in life that our patriarchs received their blessing.  Scripture after scripture where the promise indeed came... but it came later.

Let me tell you.  The word "later" is not a friend of mine.  "Now" is.  I like now.  I can do now.  Later?  Later could mean next week, next month, next year.  It could mean never.  Later  equals anxiety, muddling, fear, depression, a marathon, olympics... I mean... get my point? Later means hard. Why would I ever want to go through that?  "Later" if we are ever friends, it's not going to be sooner.  It will be later!

Here's what I know.  Scan up a few verses.

"For the earth which drinks in the rain that often comes upon it, and bears herbs useful for those by whom it is cultivated, receives blessing from God; but if it bears thorns and briers, it is rejected and near to being cursed, whose end is to be burned," (Hebrews 6:7-8).

Can I hear a "Youch" in the house?  Seriously? Seriously.  But in all seriousness, verse 7 strikes a cord.  I believe this verse is relating to the "Fruits of the Spirit" as well as the story of the fig tree and growing good fruit.

I often write about preparing for rain; waiting for rain.  This verse talks about using the rain as nourishment and growing in our walks; learning the lessons God teaches and imitating that instruction.

Now what?  Yup.  The rain in my life right now is actually my winter season.  Meaning... am I going to grow and bear fruit from these times?  Am I actually going to learn patient endurance?  It's probably a good idea.

I don't like this lesson, but I rather learn it now rather than later.